Who has held the oceans in His hands?

Who has numbered every grain of sand?

Kings and nations tremble at His voice.

All creation rises to rejoice.

Behold our God, seated on His throne.

Behold Our God by Stephen Altrogge, Jonathan Baird and Ryan Baird

When I was a teenager, God revealed Himself to me in such a way that I have never again doubted His existence.  But knowing He is, and knowing Who He is, is not quite the same thing.  I had an image of God in my mind, but the image could never quite answer the questions of pain and fear and death.  I had no idea how to have joy in my salvation.  I had no idea how to walk in victory.  But God was saying to me, “Come, and behold. I will show you who I am.”

I had an image of God that was safe and made me feel happy.  If I closed my eyes and hid myself (and I was very good at that) then the image held.  But open my eyes, and real life shattered that image again and again.  Who is this God that can allow such suffering?  So, keep my eyes closed, or ask Him to open my eyes that I may behold?  And if I opened my eyes but didn’t like what I saw?  Like Him or not, He was God.

Who has given counsel to the Lord?

Who can question any of His words?

Who can teach the One who knows all things?

Who can fathom all His wondrous deeds?

Behold our God, seated on His throne.

When I first began to really delve into the scriptures, I remember one day being struck with the fact that most of the saints and heroes in the Bible had really, really hard lives.  And not all of their lives ended well.  Some spent their whole lives in turmoil and suffering.  And it was God who called them to those lives, like Jeremiah, known as the suffering prophet.  And there was this in Acts 5:2-3, “He (Herod) killed James the brother of John with the sword, and when he saw that it pleased the Jews, he proceeded to arrest Peter also.”  But continue reading and you will see God miraculously rescued Peter from prison.  I remember saying, “But why not James too?”

In a way, Jesus answered my question when he answered Peter in John 21.  Jesus had just spoken to Peter about Peter’s future death and how it was to glorify God, and Peter, seeing John asks, “Lord, what about this man?” Jesus said to him, “If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you?  You follow me!”  But still my heart was troubled.  Who is this God I’m called to follow?

When I couldn’t understand God, I hid God in an image that felt safe to me, but it was really empty.  An image is an idol and here is what it says of idols in the Psalms:

Psalm 135:16-18 They have mouths, but do not speak; they have eyes, but do not see; they have ears, but do not hear, nor is there any breath in their mouths.  Those who make them become like them, so do all who trust in them!

I was afraid that if I said yes to God and allowed Him to open my eyes to behold Him, that somehow I would be disappointed.  That perhaps He wouldn’t live up to my ideal of Him and would possibly fall short.  How ashamed I am to even admit I felt that way, but how in awe I also am of God’s patience with me then and now.  You see, instead of being angry, He spoke this to me too, “Don’t be afraid.  You know I love you.”

Who has felt the nails upon His hands,

Bearing all the guilt of sinful man?

God eternal, humbled to the grave.

Jesus, Savior, risen now to reign!

There is no beholding God without also beholding the cross.  There is no calling me on a journey to know Him without the sacrifice of His Son.  In John 14:9 Jesus says of Himself, “whoever has seen me has seen the Father.”  Life hurts, and sometimes it hurts a lot.  But when I look up, I see the cross and I see the empty tomb and I see Jesus seated on His throne.  And I know He did all of that for me.  Because He loves me. 

To Jeremiah in chapter 33 verse 3 God said, “Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.” 

God is alive and personal and will never let us hide away in our fantasy images of Him.  He wants to walk with us in the cool of the day and commune with us. “Come, behold!” He said.  And then He showed me the cross.  And He has continued through all these years to show me the cross.

How afraid I was when God first asked me to allow Him to open my eyes to see.  But now I ask, “What wondrous, hidden depths of your grace will you show me today”  And He answers, “Behold” and shows me a love so rich, so deep, so fathomless that instead of being disappointed, I cry out, “tear down all of my images, they can’t compare!”  And wonders of wonders, fear is replaced with love.  Oh, how I love Jesus, because He first loved me.

Behold our God, seated on His throne!

Come! Let us adore Him!

Behold our King! Nothing can compare.

Come, let us adore Him!